Patrick Carone

Patrick Carone is a writer living in New York City. He's done time at Maxim and Complex, been featured as a pop-culture authority on several TV shows, and yes, he's been shot in the face with a soda gun by Guy Fieri.
Match the Instant Pot Recipe with the “Jurassic World” Dinosaur That Would Eat It
Things aren’t going so great for the heroes of Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom. Not only have terrifying new breeds of dinosaurs taken over Isla Nublar, but all of the creatures must be removed from the island, thanks to a massive volcano that’s about to erupt. Add to this some bad guys threatening the entire planet, and Owen Grady (Chris Pratt) and Claire Dearing (Bryce Dallas Howard) have their work cut out for them. (And, hopefully, workers’ comp.
May 24, 2019
5 Eighth Grade-Inspired Recipes to Awaken Your Inner Awkward Teen
Critics are raving about Eighth Grade — check out that 98 percent fresh rating on Rotten Tomatoes! — and with good reason. This heartfelt comedy presents an unflinching look at the trials and tribulations of middle school with an honesty most teen films shy away from. Focusing on the socially awkward Kayla (Elsie Fisher), the movie speaks to anyone who remembers that often-cringeworthy time of life.
May 24, 2019
5 Foods in Desperate Need of an Incredibles 2-Style Image Makeover
The hotly anticipated Incredibles 2 smashed box-office records last month, including being the biggest opening for an animated movie ever. A sequel to the 2004 tale of a family of superheroes with real-world problems, the film finds Mr. Incredible (Craig T. Nelson), Elastigirl (Holly Hunter), and the rest of the Parrs in a world in which citizens with superpowers are forced to hide their secret identities. Not cool!
Jul 6, 2018
5 Reasons Cool Ranch Doritos Are Better than the Original Ones
There really is only one choice when deciding which flavor to serve at your Super Bowl party.
Jan 30, 2017
5 Reasons Cheese Curls Are Better than Cheese Balls
When it comes to selecting a bright-orange, synthetic cheese-covered cornmeal snack with which to fill your bowl, there really is only one choice: cheese puffs. Although, indeed, there are some cheese ball enthusiasts out there, I contend that a puff-centric Super Bowl party will be vastly superior to one in which those little orbs run rampant. So lick the powder off your fingers, and read these five reasons why puffs outscore balls every single time. Eating a cheese ball isn’t natural.
Jan 26, 2017
5 Reasons the Beer Can Totally Crushes the Beer Bottle
We’ve all been there, whether at a housewarming, engagement brunch, or Super Bowl party: You open the fridge to see a phalanx of beer bottles on one shelf, and then a stack of beer cans on another. Assuming, for the purposes of this exercise, that the cans and bottles are the same brand — which do you choose? Based on the following five reasons, I say you should, without hesitation, reach for an icy-cold … can. Here’s why.
Jan 25, 2017
5 Reasons Soft Pretzels Are Inferior to Hard Ones
Pretzels — or pretzeled bread, if you want to be a stickler about it — were likely invented by monks all the way back in the Early Middle Ages (known in anthropological circles as the “pre-Cronut era”). And, all things considered, they really haven’t changed that much in the hundreds upon hundreds of years since. But even way back then, the monks could choose to eat their invention one of two ways: hard or soft.
Jan 24, 2017
Why a Potato Chip Isn’t a Chip If It Doesn’t Have Ridges
Who wants to live in a world — or go to a Super Bowl party — where the chips lack crunchy ridges?
Jan 23, 2017