So you're thinking about embarking on a relationship with a food-lover. Congratulations! I hope you don't feel uncomfortable being the third wheel when you go out to eat. You'll grow to accept this role in your partner's life, I promise.
Besides the fact that you'll probably eat well, there are a few things you should prepare yourself for in your relationship. From treating knives with respect, to learning the secret code of a grocery list, here are the 10 things you should know before making things Facebook official.
1. If you treat your partner's knives with respect, your partner will respect you.
Follow the Golden Rule, and you'll be set in your relationship. If you're cooking with your partner's knives, don't carelessly throw them in the sink to wash later, and never put them in the dishwasher. Treat knives, and your partner, with respect. Got it?
2. Saying "I don't care" when asked about dinner plans is not an acceptable answer.
You can say "I'm not hungry," or "Whatever you want," but saying "I don't care" about dinner is a slap in the face. It's like saying you don't care about them, honestly. You do care about your prospective partner, right? Good.
3. Just because someone loves eating a raw kale salad doesn't mean they won't like eating a late-night tub of ice cream, too.
Don't pigeonhole taste, man. People aren't cookie cutters – they have dimensions, which you should embrace and explore. Nobody puts baby in a corner, you hear?
4. Trust begins with salt.
Buying that big box of flaky sea salt (even though it's a few extra bucks) really is worth the cash. This is where trust in a relationship begins. You might think it's crazy to buy fancy finishing salt at the grocery store, but trust them on this one — it will make things taste better, and your relationship will be stronger as a result.
5. You'll need a plan for who washes the dishes as soon as possible.
So you just decided to start seeing one another exclusively. Congratulations! First order of business? A dishwashing plan. If they cook, do you do dishes? Do you do dishes only at his or her house? Make a plan, and stick to the plan.
6. You'll come to know the time and dates of your local farmers market. Learn to embrace this knowledge.
Sure, you might not actually like going to the farmers market every week, but it is a reality you're going to have to face every once in a while. Embrace this change in your life, and maybe get to know some of the vendors. Bonus points if you get roped into volunteering.
7. Do not be alarmed by the amount of cookbooks in their home. Do not suggest they "get rid of a couple."
Maybe when you move in together you can talk about lessening the book load. Maybe, but probably not.
8. Share your meal, share your soul.
Be prepared to share a couple bites of your meal when you go out to eat. Eventually you will feel comfortable splitting entire orders, just like your life.
9. Don't be afraid to show your emotions about the foods and dishes you don't love.
Controversy and scandal in the name of food is bound to happen — just make sure you have a solid argument. Recognize that people have different tastes and that's OK. Don't be a jerk if they disagree with you.
10. Your communication skills will be tested with grocery lists.
The bedrock of any relationship is communication, and it will be tested when you're asked to go grocery shopping. Double check that grocery list, make sure that you know exactly what kind of peanut butter is needed. Are they a crunchy person or a smooth enthusiast? Don't mess this up.
Do you have any advice for dating a food-lover?