I would probably also go through a basic spice rack with her. Give her an idea of what spices go with what types of foods.

An acquaintance's idea of cooking is to throw in all the spices that can't get away from her. Unfortunately this has meant that spaghetti sauce sometimes gets made with sage. Yech.

1) rice & dal
2) homemade sauces & dressings (marinara, pesto, salad dressing)
3) marinated/baked tofu
4) how to properly cook pasta. no joke
5) stir fried vegetables or the closest you can come on a home stove

for vegetarian cooking, i recommend a cast iron skillet.

I wrote a post about this a few years ago, which you can read here. I find teaching friends to cook is a lot of fun and hope you do, too!

Dana

I second everything @sabjumata says -- but -- is she learning to cook for one or two people versus making a family dinner every night, I'd start her out on eggs.

They're cheap enough, that if she messes up it's no big deal to throw out, and yet they can be the basis for a LOT of great meals (breakfast, lunch, and dinner).

When a friend taught me to cook, she taught me basic kitchen skills (knife skills, vocabulary, sauteeing, mixing/folding, etc.) and then gave me a set of index cards, one for each of different kinds of cuisine, that listed common spices, vegetables, starches, proteins, and cooking methods. I kind of consider this the "Suzuki" method of learning to cook, because I was free from being dependent on recipes from the start, and knew where to begin when creating my own dishes.

Cook a few basics together: risotto, pasta with a sauce, soup, curry, roasted vegetables, stir-fry, etc.

I don't think I was ever really taught how to cook, per se. My family doesn't cook, and if they do, it comes from a box or a can! and as the lone Vegetarian in the family, I was pretty much on my own. So I always think it's funny when people say "I don't know how to cook." Sure you do! Follow a recipe, google what you don't understand, and learn as you go! But if I ever teach someone else, I think it's better to learn basic skills, terminology and how to follow a recipe than to learn how to make something specific. It's like that whole "teach a man to fish" thing - if you teach her how to make a pot of beans, that's great, but who wants to eat just beans? And what is she going to do with the leftovers? If you teach her how to follow a recipe, she can make that pot of beans and some soup and some enchiladas and so on and so forth. The ultimate goal is to have your friend be able to say "hey, this recipe looks good! I'm going to make that!" - and be able to. I think the recipes that Sabjimata listed are a great start - she'll get a bunch of skills along with some Vegetarian meal staples. As a vegetarian, I eat at least one of those meals every week! I would also include a baking recipe so she can learn basic baking skills too (spoon and level flour, baking soda vs. powder, how to separate an egg, folding, etc). Nothing too crazy - maybe some corn bread to go along with some veggie chili or some cupcakes for desert. And don't forget menu planning and grocery shopping - find recipes for the meals you want to use as "examples," show her how to make a shopping list from that, and then go to the grocery store with her so you can explain the difference between spices and other ingredients without having to actually make a recipe that includes them.

Did anyone else notice that she sent in the EXACT same question today to the Washington Post? What -- you didn't like Joe's answer enough?

[and yes, clearly i spend too much time reading about food at work. i realize that.]

@sabjimata ... I totally agree. I can't believe it took 3 years of vegetarianism for me to discover baked tofu. In face, I am eating it RIGHT NOW. :) Over the years I have haphazardly taught roommates and friends to cook in a very "Food Network" fashion (mise en place, fun facts, etc.) but the one most of the remember is how to make soup... something that seems so commonsensical to a veteran but is a valuable lesson. Soups can become anything, clear out a fridge, turn into chili, a stew, be fancy or rustic... it is versatile to say the least :).

@rachdez EDIT: The one (lesson) most of them* remember

before you even touch food, go through her kitchen. see what kind of cooking tools she has. see what she needs to get. what is filling her cupboards and fridge? have her tell you what she usually cooks to evaluate her skill level and tastes. you can get a good idea of someone's habits from that. teach her how to grocery shop in a way that maximizes cooking options. what does she want to learn? cooking for one? cooking large batches she can eat from for a week? cooking fancy things for dinner parties?

after that you can start with the actual food. I would avoid cooking from recipes, though. start with basic sight and touch based concepts-- what do eggs look like when they're correctly cooked, versus under or overdone, etc. most importantly, keep it simple. once she has a foundation, she'll be able to take care of herself.

Also teach her how to select recpies that are at her level. Perhaps go shopping for cookbooks together or give her a list of websites that ranks the difficulty level of the recipe (foodtv.com, for example). Additionally explain which types of items need to be measured exactly for a beginner - such as baking, spices, water for dried items like rice and beans and which can be changed to her liking such as frying 2 eggs instead of 3 or leaving out the bell peppers if she hates bell peppers.

Encourage her to sign up for a CSA - she'll get provided with an arsenal of familiar and new produce each week, and many of the good ones supply recipes for that week's box as well.

Also +1 on basics that she can add variety to - like pasta, stir-fries, sautes.

Do versatile stuff. Omelettes or fritattas are a great place to start since they are easy and you can do so much with them. Next, I would go to soups because, again, they are versitile. Teach her to make a good veggie stock (crockpot is good) and how to change the stock flavors up. Teach her about adding different grains and pasta to the soup, and different veggies. Just by teaching her how much liquid to veggies, and different combos you could teach her veggie soup, tortilla with black beans, barley and mushroom, Asian noodle, etc... Stir fry and basic vegetable curry is good as well since they are also versatile.

a few thoughts:
- teach how to read/follow a recipe (teaching what basic terms are like mince/dice/chop, sautee, etc)
- find out what her favorite things to eat are as a vegetarian and help her learn how to make a simple version. when my mom was teaching me how to cook, she gave me a book w/ a few recipes that i loved from my childhood, plus a few others that were easy and adaptable.
- learning to make eggs properly is a good suggestion, too. i'm a vegetarian, and breakfast for dinner is always a favorite. also baked eggs on lentils...

Teach a basic tomato sauce, quiche, & vinaigrette, then help her adapt the basic recipes with different ingredients. Also, people feel brilliant when they learn to make good mashed potatoes! Teach her that in between the hard stuff. Good luck!

a basic white sauce goes a long way in cooking (butter, flour, milk). Add cooked potatoes and peas or sliced boiled eggs over toast for a simple meal. Add Parmesan cheese and you have a basic Alfredo sauce. Add shredded cheddar, dry mustard and cooked macaroni for a quick mac and cheese.

Teach her to make a basic salad dressing, both vinaigrette type and creamy (bleu cheese, or ranch or whatever fits her tastes). Fresh salad dressings are sooooo much better than bottled. Bread. It's so much easier than people think, and again, so much better. Tortillas, again, the difference between homemade and store bought is night and day. And again, they're very easy for even novices to make.

This is a really useful site for novice cooks:

http://www.jamieoliver.com/homecookingskills/

There are videos demonstrating basic techniques and skills, plus simple recipes that you could do with your friend

Great suggestion, Faith! I remember panicking the first time I had to saute some onions without my mum nearby.

Pick a few recipes that can become go-to meals (quiche, Spanich tortillas, chilli, etc) and explain basic skills like sauteeing onions and garlic, tomato sauce, etc. That way she'll be able to experiment by herself.

I found Bittman's How to cook everything vegetarian VERY useful in giving plain, useful ideas about using cabbage or beans for instance. Might be worth a look.

I would go to the store with her. Sometimes you pass through isles and pick up the same thing without noticing the rest of the stuff on the shelf, Teach her how to read a label and how to find healthy ingredients and get away from processed foods!

Ask what kinds of things she envisions herself cooking. If she's not sure, have her keep a journal of things she'd like to eat. You'll get a good idea of the sorts of things she's imagining -- right now you have no idea if by cooking, she actually means baking, if she wants to learn some basics like mac and cheese, if she's interested in preparing nice meals for her significant other, etc. At that point, you can narrow down the skills, tools, and recipes she'll need.

I'd start really simple, with a technique that can be used for any vegetable: Roasting. You can easily make a whole meal out of just roasted vegetables or add them to any other dish later down the line. Pureed vegetable soups are another great idea; again, the technique is easy and can be adapted to almost any vegetable. This will get her in the mindset of knowing HOW to do something and then thinking about new ways to try it.

Also, one of my favorite easy recipes that can be used for lots of veggies goes like this: Boil pasta. 5 minutes before it's done, add chopped asparagus (or broccoli, peas, whatever) to the water. Reserve about 1/4 cup pasta water and drain the rest. Toss pasta and veggies with some goat cheese and the reserved water; season with salt and pepper.

Anna here -- Thanks for the tips, everyone!

The first "lesson" was last night, and we went through her kitchen and looked at her tools. (Thanks, foodefafa! That hadn't occurred to me.) We made a list of things she needs, ranking them in importance. (A pair of tongs is No. 1; a toaster oven is No. 2 -- we live in Asia, so no ovens in the apartments.) We cleared out a space for a pantry. And then we made a salad (to work on knife skills) and our own vinaigrette.

I think eggs might be next.

She also checked some cookbooks out of the library and is going to find a recipe that interests her. And I suggested the food journal to help her choose, akay. We'll see how it goes.

And @NewInDupont: Yes, I did send in the same question to The Post -- not because I didn't like the answer I got there but more because I wanted more "instant gratification" so I had a starting point. I wasn't sure how long it would take for my question to get posted here -- sometimes people say things like, "I sent in this question weeks ago, and the dinner party was last weekend!"

There is an amazing book on vegetarian soups called Love Soup by Anna Thomas, written with new cooks in mind. Soups can be a great place to start and I adore this cookbook.

I am a young guy (19) and didn't have the patience to learn from my mother to cook but am trying to teach myself. The problem I had with my mother was not knowing where to start and lack of skills to do anything. I am now much better and improving substantial I will attribute this to the website rouxbe. rouxbe.com is an online cooking school and it is so clear and gives you the confidence and drills to go into the kitchen and try. I am pretty cheap but rouxbe is worth the money, the monthly rates were recently raised but the information and video recipes are invaluable, start with a 1 month trial and I guarantee your friend won't be upset. If it works for a college age guy, I think it will work even better for anyone esle

It's better to teach people techniques rather than recipes. Otherwise they have no way to move forward.

I would suggest the excellent videos at rouxbe.com are a great place for your friend to get started.