Modern thinking says we're not supposed to eat to appease emotions (anger, sadness, boredom, anxiety) and I suppose there's some wisdom there. Difficult emotions need to be dealt with, aired and examined, given a twirl and a whirl, not stuffed beneath a bellyful of ice cream. But today I went ahead and did it anyway. I took my anxious, melancholy self out of the house and set out to a favorite place, a little cafe on Grand Avenue in Oakland, CA where they serve a handful of delicious things cooked in the wood-fired oven from the pizza place next door. I went out and got myself some lunch not so much because I was hungry (I was) but because I wanted to feel better.
The light in the cafe was perfect and the music, some upbeat old-school R&B, was perfect. I had a stew of chickpeas and greens, with plenty of salt and spice and it was perfect. The cook had cracked an egg on top and put it in the wood oven until the whites were set but the yolk was still runny and then served it up in it's classic white gratin dish with a pretty blue Heath plate underneath. A few pieces of good, hearty crusty bread were tucked along the rim, already starting to soften from the steam and juices.
Lordy but it was good. Hot, salty, honest food. Food for a moody morning. Food for someone trying to figure a few things out. Food for the joy and effort it takes to live a human life with your eyes and heart reasonably open. (Most of the time.) I drew an enso circle in the dish with a piece of bread as I scooped up the last of the egg yolk. A simple, singular gesture of appreciation and plenty.
When I was done, and because I sometimes can push things little, I had a piece of almond cake and a cup of coffee. People came and went, the sun beams, caught in the windows and skylight, shifted and glowed, the music changed into something quieter. I could feel the contentment resting on my shoulders like it was a warm wooly sweater on a chilly day.
When it was time to go, I sat there for a minute and quietly said thank you. Thank you for the fact that I had the mobility, the means, even the state of mind while in the middle of my muddle, to seek something that brings comfort and joy. Thank you that I had a little jingle in my pocket to purchase this bit of pleasure and the time to enjoy it. Thank you to the cooks and the pot washers and the really friendly woman at the counter who took my order. It's a small thing to have a lunch and it's an enormous thing, too.
Then I got up and left the cafe and walked out into the wild, blue-skied world a little heartier and happier, fortified by truth and beauty and a really good lunch. I was a changed woman. 
Related: Weekend Meditation: First Light
(Images: Dana Velden of the Boot and Shoe Cafe)
How To Cook Fluffy, Tasty Quinoa
Perfect Summer Cocktail Recipe: Honey Bourbon Lemonade
Good Food to Share 
The Big Book of Small, Cool Spaces 
Apartment Therapy Presents 
The Eight-Step Home Cure 
Elizabeth Apron fro...
100 DIY Ideas for the 3-Day Weekend
Danielle's Charming, Classic Walk-Up
What a lovely post. Food has the magical power to comfort and nurture us, and I see no wrong in appreciating that!
Nourishment comes in so many forms ... so glad you were open to receive it. You give it so often. Thank you for opening your heart to us here. Your words inspire ... as always.
Do you know any more about the ingredients in that stew or how it's prepared? If so, do tell (please). Your yummy photo has me craving it ... especially since I'm cooking greens soon. I'm wondering about the spices, sauce, etc.
Wonderfully soul satisfying. I would love to have access to a cafe such as this. And that stew! I am blessed to have access to your thoughts and words. Thank you.
lifeabundant: I don't have a recipe, but here's what I would do to try to recreate it.
It was basically just cooked chickpeas and cooked greens (kale I think) at maybe twice as many chickpeas as greens. Olive oil. A good amount of salt. Heated up in a shallow gratin dish with a little bit of spicy red paste dapped here and there (maybe harissa?) I suspect it was heated up first and then the egg was added and it was put back into the oven until the white was set. Served with really good, really strong crusted bread on the side.
I don't recall onion or garlic and definitely not tomato. It didn't have a sauce, but when you broke the egg yolk, it ran everywhere and made it saucy. I think I may have to go back with my recipe developer hat on and have it again!
Something about letting others care for us, about not having to do everything ourselves... Something about indulgence, and being aware of it. It is amazing what happens to us when we pay attention. Perhaps in all the attention to the gratitude you felt for others, some sneaked in for yourself. Without even noticing you were able to feel grateful for your ability to make it through, your ability to trust, your own innate nature which puts one foot in front of another until you are in front of a little cafe.
Thank you for sharing your world so intimately.
Dana, you should recreate that almond cake, too. (I suppose I could just journey the 3 mi to get the real thing, but the idea of making an almond cake at home is too tempting...)
Exquisite.
You're not supposed to reward children with food, because it causes them to have an unhealthy relationship with food as adults. But, I think when you are having a crappy day, going out and doing something you enjoy is exactly what you should do. For me, good food is definitely high on the list of things that make me feel good, but it could be anything. Some people use retail therapy. I think indulgence, rather than overindulgence, is the key. Everyone deserves a little something for themselves every once in awhile, whether it's a cake, new shoes, or whatever. And they've shown that good food excites the same pleasure centers of the brain as cocaine or sex.
So well put. A treat on a tough day, or to celebrate--the Ph.D's say oh no! That will give you an unhealthy relationship with food! So a healthy relationship is to regard it as nothing but fuel? And language should be strictly to communicate information? Sex is just for procreation? I prefer culture to this pseudo-science, and not a people on the planet fail to love, celebrate, mourn, fortify, and heal with food.
Love this meditation. Food serves so many purposes--to nourish our bodies, our minds, and our souls. Balance and moderation is key in pretty much everything.
I so agree with #becster.henrich. Food can so nourish our minds and souls. Sometimes I'll go out for a satisfying craving and only eat a touch of it until my needs are met. Then I'll bring the doggie bag back and enjoy it again later. I have a some huge cravings but a small amount can satisfy my desires. AND I love any dish that has eggs with a runny yolk...yum.
@Dana, thanks for tips to recreate that stew. Love that you plan to enjoy it again with your recipe developer hat on ... please share any more tips you discover! I'll try my hand at it a few days after I make my greens. Enjoy your week!
Wonderful post. Made me smile.
beautiful writing. food is so abundant around us we sometimes forget its primitive, symbolic significance.
i hope your muddle clears up soon.
Eating well is the first step to doing anything well. We sometimes took pictures of our grumpy daughter before eating and smiling after eating.
We wanted to show her that her problems were merely hunger and she needed to feed herself.
I love what cmcinnyc said.
I love this so much. Definitely hits home.
I thought the narrative was kind of corny but the chickpea stew looks delicious.
I totally understand this feeling. Thanks for sharing.
Great post. At times, food can nourish the soul like nothing else.
Oh, Kate! That's wonderful!
In my mom's family, anyone who is grumpy or cranky will get hugged and fed in rapid succession.
:) ur posts always make me feel so good
Beautiful post!!!! Thank you!