I remembered the sad story told to me by a colleague who went to a white-tie dinner and received, for the main course, one half of a flounder fillet.
When the food appeared at this party I could scarcely contain my delight. It was home food! The most delicious kind: a savory beef stew with olives and buttered noodles, a plain green salad with a wonderful dressing, and some runny cheese and chocolate mousse for dessert. Heaven!
-- Laurie Colwin, Home Cooking, published by Harper Perennial
Last weekend I cooked brunch for several of my soon-to-be-husband's colleagues. It might have been a little crazy to have guests on the last weekend morning before my wedding, but it seemed essential to find some kind of peace and normality in the rhythms of eggs and coffee, fresh-baked bread and new butter, peaches and Concord grapes from the farmers market. My guests were fed well and very grateful, but I was uncomfortable with the thanks and compliments. I had just been looking for a way back to myself in a hectic time.
There is something about giving and receiving home food that returns us to a centered place. Fancy food, prepared food, too much restaurant food - whatever that may be for you or me - can distract me from the rhythms that help me be most like myself. There is something good and nourishing about returning to the home kitchen in times of stress; and home food, like Colwin illustrates above, has a delightful side effect of encouraging community.
We're serving home food at our wedding this weekend - beet and cabbage coleslaw, roast pork, autumn vegetables, big bowls of pasta. (My husband-to-be is a pasta guy through and through.) We're serving family style so that this home food is passed from hand to hand down long tables of our friends and family members, each nourishing one to the next.
We hope that our home food inspires the same sort of reaction as Colwin's relieved delight - delicious, comforting, nourishing to receive in the company of friends. But maybe that's too much to ask - it's just food, after all. Eaten once, soon forgotten. And yet even that is enough - it's enough to nourish people and perhaps it's far better that they forget the food and remember the company and the pleasure of one another instead.
Home food and home cooking - it's The Kitchn this month. Eat in this week and this weekend - have a friend or two over. Open a bottle of wine and enjoy the good pleasures of the home table. We'll be right there with you.
• Buy Home Cooking: A Writer in the Kitchen, $12 at Amazon
Related: Good Quote: Laurie Colwin on Home Cooking
(Image: Faith Hopler)
hear, hear!
view spossberg's profile
We did that at our wedding two years ago yesterday. So many people commented on how wonderful it was, and it is one of the things I remember most fondly, simple autumn foods with good company, "family style" indeed.
view herz9160's profile
My hope for you, as you begin a new way of being in the world with your upcoming marriage, is that you will accept thanks and gratitude and appreciation, and not be uncomfortable with that. That is the real reason that we eat together--to share something good and to find connection--and that's exactly what your wedding menu will bring to others. I trust that you will recognize that every day during your married life with the pasta guy of your dreams.
view krister's profile
I am so entranced by your wedding plans and the food; I wish I had done the same!
view jgphotomom's profile
i have that green sugar container.
view redmolly's profile
I love Laurie Colwin. Her books (both the novels and the nonfiction, as well as the essays from Gourmet) are just so perfect.
Congrats on your upcoming marriage!!
view mgood's profile
I love the idea of family style food at your upcoming wedding.
Might I ask, how many people are on your invite list? What do you think is the max # of guests for this kind of service?
I'm in the day dream phase of wedding planning for a 2010 event...and would love for our meal to represent our style like yours does.
view hillbillyinthecity's profile
I totally want to know where that sugar container came from. LOVE IT!
view pghjezebel's profile
Sugar container: TJ Maxx or Marshalls
Family style food: We had about 150 people, including 25 kids. I don't think there is a max; if anything it's easier on the waitstaff because they don't have to serve individual plates or tend a buffet or handle long lines at said buffet. Our food came out very quickly. It was wonderful!
OK - going away now. :-) It's nice to visit the site just as a reader! See you all next Monday with plenty of wedding food details.
view faith's profile