Thanksgiving is all about thankfulness and togetherness. And it's about sharing a special meal. At gatherings like this, some families seat kids and adults together and some seat them separately. We decided to hold a joint survey with our sister site Ohdeedoh and find out: What does your family do?
There are pros and cons to each seating method. There is something special about having different generations of families together around the table to break bread, tell stories and laugh at each other's jokes. Even if you're visiting together all day, the pace of a meal allows you to slow down and come together as a family.
On the other hand, the pace of an adult's meal can be much slower than a child's and kids may feel restless at the table waiting for adults to finish or become bored listening to adult conversation. One of the benefits to having a separate kids table can be the camaraderie building among cousins and other young relatives who may see each other infrequently.
• See the comments at Ohdeedoh: Do You Have a Separate Kids Table for Thanksgiving?
What do you think? Do you like having a kids' table? Or do you prefer to mix the groups?
Related: Thanksgiving Decor: Fun Ideas for the Kids' Table
(Image by Flickr user Abby Batchelder licensed for user under Creative Commons)
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Comments (21)
There are only 5 of us. We are all adults. We all eat together. It is excellent.
Really no kids in my family anymore, at least not close enough to be at gatherings. When I was young, sometimes there would be a kids table just to accommodate more people than could fit at the primary dining table, but it was never a rule.
No kids for the next few years :)
We have too many people for a single table and set up at least two. It's never designated kids or adults, but the kids end up wanting to sit together. They usually come through the buffet first and choose their own seats. By the time the adults sit, they have relegated us to the "adults" table. ;-)
When the whole family gets together (aunts, uncles, cousins), we have to have more than one table. The "grown ups" (parents, aunts, uncles all middle-aged and older) like to sit together so they can enjoy their conversation. The "kids" (aged from 25 to early 30s) are seated at their own table(s) so they (we) can be as rowdy as they want.
That was the general set up last year. With the exception of the larger table where I was seated with my sister, a couple of cousins, my husband, my mom, my mom-in-law and sis-in-law. My brother and girlfriend were the lucky ones to sit with the rest of the cousins. And my dad with the rest of the "grown ups."
Of course, this all depends on the ocassion, how many people are present, number of tables.
What a little cutie smiling in that photo!
When I was a kid we had a long dining table that we would supplement by putting the picnic table and the card table, all in a long line. We kids sat at the far end, and grownups in order of importance up to the top, where my dad stood in grand dignity carving the bird and sending our plates back with various bits of turkey. Not unusual for us to have 25-30 at table. But we kids were there, part of the scene, carrying on conversations, etc. I wouldn't trade the memories for anything.
On the years we celebrate thanksgiving with my father's side of the family, the youngest person at the "kids" table is a sophomore in college, and six (three couples) of us are married. Despite this, we'll always be the "kids" table, even the years we all sit together at one (massive) table. Having a gathering of over 20 people usually requires multiple tables. It isn't unusual however, for an "adult" to sit at the "kids" table or vice versa. It definitely adds to the (rather loud) fun.
It depends on the size of the crowd. It's usually large so we do have a separate table for the kids but it's in the same room.
One year, I used plywood and yards and yards of material to cover my pool table so that we could all sit together. It was, surprisingly, less Beverly Hillbillies than you'd imagine.
We always had a kids table, and that eventually morphed into the "2nd generation" table, as we were all still sitting separately when we were 23 and up (can't really fit 30 people around one table, this was the natural division anyway)
I have 10 siblings alone so Thanksgiving was a crowd. We always had a kids table. I was so excited and anxious the year I finally was able to sit at the adults table. Only to find out how boring it was and I wanted back to the kids table. We still have a kids table as they usually eat sooner and want to be out the door faster.
like liefie My family is growing but nobodys table has gotten bigger, which means nobody is really graduating from the kids table. Some of the "kids" are now sitting at the kids table with their own kids! Its mostly the older generation and then the younger one keeping an eye on their kids.
The youngest person at our "kids" table is my cousin's two year old. Everyone else is in their 20s. It's still the "kids table," though.
So I'm in adam and liefie's boat.
Both of my parents were only children and my two brothers were 10 years+ older than my sister and I, so even when we had guests at the holidays, we always had a buffet line in the kitchen and then people all sat at one of two tables. Not enough kids to have a kids' table. I always wanted a kids table--and I always wanted to have cousins.
Like @liefie our "kids" table has become the 2nd generation table. We have over 50 guests so there are two seatings..."kids" (I'm 26 and this still includes me and my husband) are the first seating and adults are the second seating. We do a buffet style and there are no assigned seats. Dessert is more casual, just grab a plate and a seat whenever you have room for more food!
My husband's father is the second oldest of eleven children, so there are always about 40 people at Thanksgiving, and the "young uns" tend to gravitate towards each other. The adults get a little annoyed that we don't want them at the kids' table!
When our whole family gets together,traditionally we had a kids table.I was often sat there because I was the oldest.Then I was still sitting there because I was unmarried.THEN....I had a child and was STILL sat at the kids table.Went on for years.
Now my daughter is grown and everyone ones children have grown and I am still at the kids table because I have become the eccentric Auntie Mame of the family.Our kids table now has become the generation gap table and the 'fun' table.I am still celebrating the hols with the same people as ever and still separate.It took 20 years,but I am finally at the best table at the party.We have taken over the basement and garage.We have a party and the oldsters have dinner.I am one of the few in the family that knows everybody and every generation.
It didn't start out that way.I used to call family gatherings my O.F.F. day.
O.F.F. means Obligatory Family Function.Oh I used to hate them.No more.
P.S. hostess's...adults at the kid table would like the same meal as the old folks table.Just saying.I used to bring my own drinks in my purse! LOL! Nothing good ever made it around the adult table and over to the kid table to me.I spent years...no drink,no dressing,no serving of special dishes made or brought etc...I tries venturing out to the adult party over the years.It's too late.I can't hang there because they are all senile.I still have nothing to talk to them about.Through the year they don't invite me to very much.The 'kids' do though.They don't think I'm weird,eccentric or shocking at all.Never did because they got to know me better than anybody else,older or my age, in the family.It's become a slippery slope because even at weddings etc...the kids are sitting me with their co-workers and out of towners.They assure me it's because I am the easiest to know.I sure hope so!
We have an adult and "kids" table, but all the kids are adults now, but we still call it the kiddie table. And if one of the older "adults" is being bad, they get sent to our kiddie table as punishment. And we still make a lot of noise during the football games, but then all the kids are absolutely silent during commercials. It's just a game we love to play, even 30+ years into the tradition :)
My grandma's table isn't quite big enoguh for everyone, so it gets extended into the living room with a card table - still under the tablecloth and everything, but it's always me and my cousin down on the end and always has been. You could call it the kids' bit of the table, though I'm 20 now and she's 18. I suspect part of it may be so nobody else has to look at her eat. (Equal parts potato topping and mashed potatoes, doused with balsamic vinegar and mixed together? Seriously? And I had to watch her EAT that.) My cousin and I are always across from each other, and usually at one end, when the family is eating together, whether it's at grandma's or a restaurant. Unless the table is round, in which case we're next to each other.
There will be my 4yr old daughter and 6yr old nephew at our celebration this year and they are sitting with us.
When I was growing up, the adults sat in the dining room and the kids sat in the kitchen.
Since there is no kitchen table in her current house, my mom just puts a card table at the end of the dining table and the kids sit there, but mostly because it is lower and easier for them.
There's only one kid (my own and she's 3) at our holiday gatherings as the other kids live states away.. She eats with us. When I was a kid there was a separate kid table and I hated it so I wouldn't do it to kids now..