Oh, Emma, I can't either. My Asian friends try so hard to teach me but I'm still a klutz with them! Wish I could!

The only way to build the skill is to practice. Use them for a week exclusively...

i cant either. i tried to master it during many frustrating meals. I have finally given up and now I just ask for a fork. I would rather enjoy my food than fight with it.

the only exception is sushi, its simple enough to pick up big pieces of sushi. Although i still inevitably drop at least one into my soy sauce/wasabi mixture and splash it everywhere.

I can use them well except for when eating rice. I just can't ever seem to master using them as a scoop. :/

If you've gone through so many tutorials already, not being able to use chopsticks is a sign of something else, and I wouldn't limit it to just chopsticks.

I am no longer allowed to go to Chinatown, as I keep buying beautiful chopsticks with the promise that *this* time I will learn to use them! I have over 30 sets of chopsticks, mostly used for mixing cocktails, or latte style cups of coffee.

@JudiAU is probably right. That, or one full bag of Smartfood, one piece at a time.

You are not alone!

When I was young, my mom just handed me a pair of chopsticks and left me to my own devices, because I'm left handed. I can pick up pretty much anything, but don't do it "properly" as per the tutorials. I remember stabbing food a lot as a child. As long as you manage to eat semi-neatly, who cares about doing it properly?

Practice! That's all it really takes.

I most often see people struggling with the top chopstick, because they're pinching it between their thumb and middle finger, instead of allowing it to rest on the side of the first joint on the middle finger, just like a pencil. If you can write with a pencil, you can use chopsticks. The motion is identical.

@zorbs, there might be some ergonomics issues. There's a proper or most efficient way for almost everything of this sort--sitting in a chair, holding a violin and bow, how to insert ear buds, etc..

but like you said, if it's so-and-so (not injuring you), then who cares

I am awesome at using chopsticks. When I was a kid, I used them to eat everything from spaghetti to salad to grapes because it was just a lot more fun than using a fork and knife.

i agree... at least you are trying! this post reminds me of the first time i went out to eat with my (asian) boyfriend's parents to sunday dim sum in cleveland... i was the lone white person at the table of 10, and a waitress very inconspiculously slid a fork on my napkin with no questions asked, before even attempting the chopsticks... haha. i vowed since that day to master chopsticks!! i'm still so-so with rice, but who cares, you just pick up the rice bowl to your mouth and use the sticks to shove it in your mouth just like the asians do! not the most graceful thing, but... when in rome, do as the romans do!

keep practicing! when i was 21 me and my then bf moved haphazardly to nyc. being flat broke, no jobs, and nothing with us more than a suitcase full of clothes each when we finally did get our own place we couldn't afford silverware (or much else) so we went to china town and bought a 250 count pack of chopsticks and used them for EVERY SINGLE meal.

do that and you'll get it!!!

I could never lean how to use chopsticks despite everyone's attempts until I went to China for several weeks. Then it was learn or starve. Now I use them whenever I can as it is more fun and forces you to eat a little slower. I am still not great but way better than before.

My mom taught me the basics when I was a kid, but I never was really efficient with them until I hit college and my boyfriend and I loved to share Chinese takeout ($6 for a huge tub of lo mein, what could be better?). We learned together and now I'm a pro, rice and all.

I am hopeless as well. We went out for sushi on Friday and its just pathetic.

Heh, I used to be good enough at them - functional but certainly not graceful and I always had problems with rice. That all changed when I traveled around Japan for 3.5 weeks, but the end they simply became an extension of my fingers!

I can use them except for rice. And my hand always gets a big cramp near the end of the meal and after making it THAT far, I have to ask for a fork!

Spend a few weeks using chopsticks for any meal where you can reasonably substitute it for when you would use a fork. Main thing is to get your fingers to hold the chop sticks well. The bottom stick should be held firmly in place with your pinky and ring finger against the side of the hand where your thumb is. This bottom stick shouldn't move much. Focus on the top stick so that it does all the moving, manipulated by your thumb, pointer and middle finger.

I would just like to point out that me, my best friend, and my cousin grew up using chopsticks and none of us use them "properly." Just figure out what works best for you. :)

Oh, I'm pro with chopsticks. There's this game you can play with chopsticks - 2 bowls half full of water, put 10 marbles in each bowl. Try to put all of the marbles in the other bowl of water. I can beat all of my Chinese friends and it makes them so angry :). It's all about how you hold them, oh, and eat the rice with a spoon, and the stuff on the rice with sticks. I jam the lower chopstick in the space between my index finger and thumb, and then hold it there with my ring finger (using the side of my finger between the last knuckle and tip of the finger.) It should be solid. Hold the other chopstick like you hold a pen. Only the top chopstick moves. This might not be the traditional way to do it, but it works really well for me.

I've never been able to figure it out either, despite numerous pep-talks (including today's) where I tell myself to use them or starve. No dice. I end up stabbing the bigger pieces, and then holding the bowl up to my chin and scooping. Not graceful, and not a pleasant meal experience, either.

i learned by reading the package when i was 9 or 10.

I'm in the same boat! try as I might I'm just not very good with chopsticks. I also don't hold a pen correctly so that might have something (everything) to do with it... unfortunately Dim Sum is one of the greatest things on earth and even though I force myself to use chopsticks as often as possible, my hands still hate them :\

I'm half Chinese and I suck at using chopsticks.

I'm Asian and I don't use chopsticks properly but I can pick up food and get it to my mouth. I tend to hold them in a way that they cross each other like scissors but that works for me. My mom just gave me chopsticks let me figure them out myself. I also happen to grip a pencil oddly when I draw or write.

I can hold them according to the diagrams, but that takes conscious effort and I switch back once I start focusing on enjoying my food.

My quarter chinese, mostly white, bf holds them properly though. He hates it when only he gets slipped a fork at Asian restaurants.

Truth be told, my husband learnt out of sheer embarassment. On our second date, he took me to a fabulous Chinese restaurant and asked for chopsticks. The waitress was a bit confused, as it was his regular Chinese place and apparently the ten years previous had been full of plates and forks for him.

But, give a man an hour and a beautiful girl and he'll learn how to use them.

I'm pretty hopeless as well! I can manage chunky foods fairly well, but noodles? Please. Rice?? Don't even think about it! I'm already a slow eater, I don't need unmanageable cutlery getting in the way!

My husband - who is a super white-bread kinda guy, with no "ethnic" traditions in the family - is expert-level with chopsticks. It makes me sad :(

I can't use chopsticks and it embarrasses and bothers me...whine. #firstworldproblems

I didn't grow up using chopsticks, whenever anyone would try to explain it to me, I would fumble with them an fail miserably.

A friend finally got me into it around 18 or 19, and now I'm a pro.

And then a few months ago I realised - whenever anyone would try to teach me as a child, they'd have me hold them in my right hand. I'm left handed.

Perhaps try the other hand?

I also have no chopstick skills, but I generally hate chinese food so this isn't an issue. I can get by picking up sushi without problems.

@Nerves, I was taught to use chopsticks by someone from Singapore and she also uses the "only the top one moves" method.

Aside from that tip, practice definitely makes perfect.

It really just takes practice. Once you've done it long enough, you will be able to master it. That doesn't mean that you'll do it the proper way, but as long as you can use it well and not injure yourself, that's all that matters. Many Asians don't do it the right way either.
My dad (first generation immigrant) never holds his chopsticks properly. I always tease him about it, but it's ok. At the end of the day, he's used to HIS way and it works for him.
Chopsticks really are a versatile tool in the kitchen, not just for eating. You can replace a tong with chopsticks with just about anything except for maybe picking up a big slab of steak (even that you can do with chopsticks but will just be a little tiring).

I spent time in Korea and one of the fun things they do at street fairs is to put stainless steel ball berrings in a pan of oil and hand you a pair of stainless steel chopsticks. Drives them crazy trying to pick up the ball berrings. Those that do manage to pick it up and set it ourside of the pan get a wonderful prize--belive me, it's not easy.

First, please buy reuseable ones. The wooden ones are responsible for a lot of horrible deforestation. Now you'll have your own at the house. Practice at home with your family and friends. My boyfriend helped me learn at home, and we spent hours giggling at my awkward learning process. It took some time but you'll get it eventually! Try it with someone who knows how to use them.

ps And from what I heard, don't ask for chopsticks at a Thai restaurant unless you're eating noodles. Otherwise the wait staff might get annoyed. ;)

I lived in Japan for a while as a child and picked up chopstick skills then. Once, I was sitting at my desk at work shoveling glass noodles into my mouth when I realised my (Korean) co-worker was watching me intently. When I looked at her she told me: 'sorry, I've just never seen a white person use chopsticks so well!' It was a weird compliment, I guess.

My daughter is two and is already using kiddie chopsticks (with the finger rest) that we purchased from our local Japanese grocer in preparation for a possible move to Japan.

I have two friends that make a huge deal about not being able to use chopsticks. If you hand them chopsticks, they make giant motions about how they can't use them. I always want to say, "No kidding, nobody could eat with a fork if they went about it that way." Of course, they think anything "cooked oriental" is too foreign to eat, so it's a self solving problem.

My dad taught me when I was a kid (he traveled to Japan a lot for work), but I really got good with them by going to my (Korean) best friend's house for dinner all the time in high school. :) Practice, practice, practice! I think getting over the anxiety of looking like a fool until you're good at using is essential. Don't worry so much.

I'm all over using chopsticks. I don't know what I'd do without them in the kitchen, either. But as a white-bread girl who learned at the end of high school, I have no idea how to teach a kid to use them. When do you start? How? (My Asian husband is a chopstick-crosser, so I can't leave t up to him! :) )

I can't eat Asian food without chopsticks! I don't know how I learned, I think I just knew I had to when we moved to China when I was young!

Nope, definitely not alone! I am chopstick-impaired too. It is actually one of my life's goals to figure them out. ;)

I definitely cannot use chopsticks and have tried to learn numerous times!

I carry those kid ones around that actually look like tweezers.

The best method is full immersion. You need a situation where it is learn to use chopsticks or starve. I was terrible until I spent week with a host family in Japan when I was 12.

I have hand cramping from overuse syndrome (playing the viola) and I can't use them! so don't worry. But, this came as a problem when I couldn't eat Shabu, so my ex advised me to move the bowl closer to me, it sloshed onto my lap and I have 2nd degree burn scars (improving I hope?) on a large part of my thigh. sad!

I'm pretty good with them! My favourite cuisine is Japanese, so whenever I get pretty much anything Japanese (be it takeaway or a sit-down restaurant), I use chopsticks. Rice is still an issue - I drop it a lot - but anything else is fine.

Thank you for learning to use the chopsticks.
It's not easy at first. If you can't manage it, just ask for a fork or spoon. No judging.
I don't know how to use the fork, spoon and knife in formal dinning. Which hand is using what and put in which side?

Practice isn't enough. I'm a drum player, I don't currently play very much because of problems with my wrist. However I'm a worse player now that I play once every couple months than 6 years ago when I was practicing nearly every day. It's constant practice that really improves a skill, sporadic practice doesn't work because you aren't building any muscle memory, basically if you aren't using chopsticks on a regular basis then you are basically relearning how to do it each time. Thankfully once you have that muscle memory built there very little that can take it away, you can be rusty at it (like I am at playing drums) but you can get yourself back in practice in a much faster time.

I agree with the practice part. Trying to pick up grains of rice or peas is a good way to build dexterity. Remember how you learned to point & click with a mouse? It's sort of the same thing, awkward at first, but then it becomes natural.

I learned when I was really little, as each weekend more or less we used to visit a Chinese woman who had looked after my mom when she was younger. I don't remember being 'taught' exactly, but there's definitely a muscle memory there.

I would suggest practicing with something like dry cereal. Decrease the size of the cereal as you get more proficient with your chopsticks.

I have a friend who is Japanese, grew up in japan, still lives there, her whole family uses chopstick for every meal, and she can't. Everyone has tried to teach her numerous times, and she just can't do it.

It was funny eating dinner with her parents, they were so impressed I could use them and she couldn't. Poor girl.

For me the motivational tool to learn was THE POWER OF SHAME: I went to a hot-pot restaurant as a first outing with my Taiwanese in-laws, and the server observed my struggling, nervous, sweaty, clumsy, whitey-white self...and plunked down a fork and spoon as an act of pity. UTTERLY MORTIFIED. Since that day I vowed to be the best chopstick user ever, and now I use them better than my partner (he crosses his!) Seriously, my skills are pro. Here's two tips you might not have heard for those just learning:
- use the slightly-tapered kind, more popular Japanese style than Chinese.
- use wooden ones rather than smooth plastic or metal for better grip.
- use them every day. EVERY DAY. EVERY MEAL! EVERY SNACK! (I'm eating grapes with chopsticks right now)

When I was a kid we practiced with popcorn.

I put your chopsticks in your hand with the points apart, that way when you tense your index finger, the gap closes and holds the bit of food. (spring loaded)

I was taught, two fingers on the top chopstick is the proper way, but found it difficult to control. So i only have one finger on the top chopstick.

Also fellow chopstick users, were you taught that polite way is take food is to approach the item with the chopsticks on either side of the item?

Dad gave me some story about the thumb and index finger, holding a sake cup of wine, as if you are toasting the party for good health or something...

I can't eat any Asian cuisine with a fork. Food flies everywhere! When I go out eating with my Chinese friend, she asks for a fork, they give it to me, but it's for her.

Coordination and practice. I learned at an early age.

I can knit, crochet, needle felt and embroider, but I can't seem to get the hang of chopsticks. It's rather embarrassing when out with a group of friends. I once had a server bring me a pair of chopsticks designed for children because she felt sorry for me...you are definitely not alone. ;)