I remember watching a VHS tape about ocean conservancy in elementary school. The shades were drawn, the lights were dimmed, and my tiny little brain was assaulted with images of helpless sea creatures in various states of pollution-induced despair. The stand-out culprit? Plastic six-pack holders. We were taught to clip the rings before tossing the evil devices into the trash, and then to pat ourselves on the back for doing our part to save the oceans. But I think we all know — that's not really enough.